Visit to the juju priest

Will there ever be time for women to rest, stop thinking and just relax. Believe everything will fall in place, stop imagining the negative things that may never happen and channel your thoughts into all positive events.

When a girl is born, most prayers said by people to the child is “she will be a good wife, she will marry a man destined for her, she will give birth to goodly and godly children, her home will be filled with so much joy, she will be the point in which her husband will breakthrough…”

These prayers are actually endless. The whole story is just making the girl know that her life must be dedicated to her husband.  As this young girl grows her thought and ideas are channelled to marriage, making a home and fanning the ego of her future husband.

I once dated a medical doctor who told me his mother’s decision is never sought rather his father would ask for his opinion because his mother does not have the right to make decisions. His mother is a teacher yet her opinion does not count in her house. O God me… I had to mention that this guy is a doctor here, so we understand that education does not validate rational thought even though it is meant to be a process where we can be objective and unbiased when it comes to all aspect of life.

It is difficult to imagine that most educated people still think like this, yes they do. Our culture and religion has not been able to separate patriarchy and equity. It is in this regard that you discover that an educated person may likely have same mind set as one who has never seen the four walls of a school.

I laughed hard during the weekend, a woman requested to see me somewhere in town, I have never met her before but she said she follows some of my post and wanted us to talk. Well, we met at a restaurant in the middle of the town. She said so many things that I personally do not agree with but she made me laugh hard.

I like the fact that she is highly educated, I like the fact that she wanted to talk to me, I like her sophistication and her wisdom. Yes, I do not agree with some of the things she said because I won’t go that far to keep a man yet I just could not judge her. I am not in her shoes and it will be wrong to think I would have acted differently. 

The reason why I laughed hard was because she said she had to cage her husband when she realized he was going to turn her into a psychiatrist patient. She had to seek the services of a juju priest so she can have a bit of calm and quiet in her life, yet she has continued to adore and serve him like a wife should. She said it will be grave damage if she relays on the instruction of the juju priest only.

I saw the wisdom of this woman. That she had caged her husband didn’t give her the right to turn him into her slave and make his life unbearable, all she wants is a loving husband who respects her decision and understand that she is an important component of the family.

You see, women do a lot of things all in the name of marriage. This is sad! The only way out is for parents to start raising children to be responsible and respect commitment. This should not be done based on gender but based on the fact that everyone deserves to be treated as humans. Our attitude to people is a reflection of how we treat those in our home.   

If parents fail to raise children with sound and objective minds then we find our children getting married to broken people who cannot differentiate stupidity from intelligence.